Ah, comparison. That sneaky little voice in your head that whispers,
“They’re doing better than you,” while you sit there doom-scrolling, simultaneously eating a bag of crisps and beating yourself up. But what if I told you that comparison isn’t the enemy? In fact, it might just be your greatest teacher.
Hear me out.
Comparison Isn’t the Villain, It’s the Mirror
Let’s meet 'Lisa'. Lisa isn't her real name; she is a coaching client of mine, but we all know a Lisa (and, let’s be honest, we’ve all ‘been’ Lisa). Every week, she comes to our sessions, riled up about how some friend on Instagram is “copying” her ideas—and worse, seemingly thriving at it.
“They’re getting clients. They’re posting all this stuff that’s ‘basically’ what I do, but ‘better’! And I know they’re watching me!”
Classic Lisa.
But when I gently ask Lisa about her own efforts, her face says it all. She hasn’t posted consistently in weeks. Her “brilliant ideas” are still in her Notes app. She spends more time analysing other people’s success than putting in the work to create her own.
Here’s the hard truth: the people who trigger us the most often show us exactly where we’re slacking. Comparison is a flashlight, pointing out the dusty, neglected corners of our own lives.
Want the Glow-Up? Put in the Reps
You don’t get six-pack abs by glaring at someone else’s workout routine. You get them by showing up, every day, and doing the work. Life works the same way.
When Lisa finally stopped moaning about Copycat Cathy and started examining her own habits, we uncovered the truth:
- She wasn’t putting in the reps.
- She was making excuses about being “too busy” or “waiting for the right inspiration.”
- Deep down, she knew she was being lazy, and we worked through how feeling lazy can also be a freeze state, and I gave her tools so get out of the freeze state.
The same way you build muscle by consistently lifting weights, you build success by consistently showing up for your goals. Posting once a month isn’t consistency. Dreaming about success isn’t effort. And whining about other people’s wins is just... procrastination in a fancy outfit.
Flip It: Turning Comparison into Your Superpower
Here’s the mindset shift that changed everything for Lisa (and will work for you too):
1. Ask Yourself: What Triggers Me—and Why?
Instead of stewing in envy, get curious. Does their discipline make you feel guilty about your lack of it? Does their creativity shine a light on your tendency to hold back? Let the discomfort guide you toward growth.
2. Make It About You, Not Them
If someone’s success bothers you, it’s because it’s showing you something you WANT - and aren’t fully pursuing. Use that energy to focus on your own path instead of being distracted by theirs.
3. Put in the Reps
Comparison feels awful when you know, deep down, that you’re not doing the work. Start small. One action today, then tomorrow, and the next. Consistency beats inspiration every time.
4. Celebrate Effort, Not Perfection
No one starts off amazing. Stop comparing your behind-the-scenes to someone else’s highlight reel. Focus on progress, not perfection.
No More Excuses: You Know Where You’re Slacking
We all know where we could do better.
-The hours spent binge-watching TV instead of brainstorming ideas.
-The mornings we hit snooze instead of exercising. This is what is so great about the Reset sessions, you don't need to leave your home!
-The plans we’ve talked about forever but haven’t actually started.
Excuses are the easy way out. But the truth? Success is just a series of boring, unglamorous, daily actions that compound over time.
Lisa’s Breakthrough
Once Lisa stopped playing the victim and started putting in the work, everything shifted. She committed to showing up on Instagram consistently. She put her ideas out there, even when they felt half-baked. She stopped obsessing over Copycat Cathy and started focusing on being her best self.
Guess what? In a few months, she became the person others started comparing themselves to.
And so it goes on….
MONDAY QUESTIONS
Next time you find yourself falling into the comparison trap, ask:
- What is this situation trying to teach me?
- Where can I put in more effort?
- How can I show up consistently, starting today?
Because the secret to flipping comparison into success is simple:
Stop looking at others and start putting in the reps.
Now, get out there and lift—your dreams are waiting.
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